jer asked, i love my girlfriend n i want to marry & settled with her now but i cud not coz she as well as myself have to finish our important family work,what will i do? i can't live without her in just 1 hour also,plz help!!!!!!

Love Guru answers, Stop being silly! If there are a few loose ends to tie up before the wedding, go ahead and do so. And if they're not a big deal, stop delaying unnecessarily. Stop being so insecure and work together towards your future instead of acting like a child.

Meenakshi asked, Hi, i m 29 years old. I am deeply in love with a man who is married and elder to me. He also loves me a lot but many times i get insecure in this relation i cannot live without him but besides his love for me his is very much caring for his family wife and for that he can do anything. I dont know where shud i go please suggest me right path.

Love Guru answers, Meenakshi, the right path is your own, without trying to land another woman's husband. He has the best of both worlds -- you and his wife. But what about your own happiness? Can he take you out in public? Can he give you a home, a family, children? No, he cannot. So decide whether you want to throw away your whole future for one older man who can't give you anything you want from life.

Sohan asked, hi luv guru...I luv a girl who was also working in my office. our parents are also for our marriage.but before i proposed her she was in relation with a guy from our office. she had physical relation with that guy. I come to know this frm third person so i asked her directly n she aggied that she had relation with that guy. I take it as a mistake witch can be made by anyone when he/she is young n was ready to marry her n told her not to keep any relation with that guy. but she continues to talk with him on pn this irritate me a lot. One day i told her every thing and finaly said that k i will not marry her now. But now she has changed completely bt i am unable to beleive her also i cant forget what she had done previously. Now i am confused what should i do...please hel me luv gure. Thank You

Love Guru answers, Sohan, you cannot hold it against her that she had a physical relationship with that guy. At that time she didn't know she would end up with you. But yes, I can understand you not wanting her to be friendly with him. Why was she still chatting with him? What was the reason behind it? In any case, if you love her and want to settle down, you'll have to learn to trust her. Life's about second chances, after all.

Arpitha asked, I had a relationship with my neighbor's son. It was sexual and he provided me the relief I wasn't getting from my husband. 3 years ago, he moved to another town for his college. My daughter also joined that college. Now, both of them say that they are in love and want to get married ? I want him and fear that my sex will continue even if he gets married to my daugher. What should I do ?

Love Guru answers, Arpitha, you need to talk to this boy alone. Ask him what his intentions are with your daughter. If he really loves her and his intentions are honourable, you need to do the honourable thing too, as a mother,and step aside for your daughter's sake. He is a young man and the two of you have no future together. If you're frustrated sexually, you need to approach your husband about that and work on your own marriage instead of catching hold of young boys.

sai asked, hi lg . in a relationship wth a girl..bt the prblm is dat roj roj sirf aur sirf fight on small small things.not a day has gone without having a fight wth her on fone.im really disturbed and she always says dat i hv got soemthin for my best frnd and she always link us whnever things go wrong and sometimes even says wrong things about my life like "bhadme jaye tumhare gharwale " aur bhi bahut kch.. i really dnt knw wad to do ? cn u help me

Love Guru answers, Look, Sai, she can't conveniently accuse you of having an affair with your best friend every time you fight. Having said that, I don't think any girl will tolerate her boyfriend having a female best friend -- it becomes a tussle as to who is closer to him. How would you like it if she had a male best friend? Wouldn't like that too much, would you? So you need to balance this out in such a way that she doesn't feel like your friend is a threat to her. As for the insults, I think both of you should make a pact not to insult each other's families no matter what. That is not cool.

VICKY asked, HI LOVE GURU how r u? i m 28 m working in mnc n having a n affair with extra maitial affair. she wants 1 child frm me . i am very confused, coz i am also married, n having 1 doughter wht shuld i do?

Love Guru answers, Are you mad? How can you even consider something like that? That child will be plagued by the tag of illegitimacy and your own family's happiness will crumble if such a thing happens. Vicky, stop being an absolute fool and considering this nonsense. Do you even realise that if you go ahead with this, your girlfriend will be able to take you to court if you break up with her and demand child support? And how do you think you'll keep your other child a secret from your family? Show some shame and be faithful to your wife. Call this stupid affair off or then get a divorce.

angi asked, hi luv guru....dis is Angi....m 20 yrs old.......a guy named Sanju who is 27 yrs elder dan me...v met in hi5....he became gud frnds wid me.....v started talkin on phone as well.....bt after a mth or so..he proposed me....I declined it sayin dat....I luv a guy who's my best frnd too.......me n Sanju live in same city....v planned many times to meet....bt due to some probs v cud nt.....he told me.....dat.....he wants to b very close to me...n kiss me on my lips.....even if he knws I luv sm1 else.....hw do I make him understand?

Love Guru answers, Angi, it seems to me like you're enjoying the attention that Sanju is giving you quite a lot. No girl who is in love will want to meet another guy or stay friends with him if he showers her with unwanted attention. The truth is that you're attracted to him and want to see what will happen. So stop kidding yourself -- and me -- about not wanting to be more than friends with him. Just remember, he's 7 years older than you. So don't put yourself in a position to be taken advantage of.

Love Guru says, Time's up, folks! Catch you next week, same time, same place! Till then, email me at mailtheloveguru@rediffmail.com! Cheers!

Also see: 'Handicapped and desperately in love'