M S Subbulakshmi passed away a few months after noted Bharata Natyam dancer Lakshmi Viswanathan published the book on MS, Kunjamma -- Ode to a Nightingale.

I cannot believe that it is already one year since MS Amma passed away. I think that is because we are hearing her voice every morning. Can a day start without her Venkatesa Suprabhatham?

I get sudden waves of nostalgia and I wish I could see her and her beautiful smile. I saw a lot of her in the last two years of her life because I was writing a book on her.

The last time I met her, it was in the hospital, a week before she passed away. Her face lit up with a smile when she saw me. That smile used to light up her eyes and face; it was a smile from the heart.

My mother [Alamelu Viswanathan] first met MS when both of them were teenagers, and MS used to affectionately call her Ambulu.

I was three years old when my mother took me to a concert of Amma [MS]. I can still see in front of me the picture of MS I saw that day in a yellow silk sari, with lots of malli poo [jasmine] in her hair. I think she sang a Meera bhajan and even though I was so young, I felt divinity in her rendering.

Once at a concert of hers, she saw me waiting in the crowd, and immediately signalled to me with those very expressive eyes of hers to come closer. In front of everyone, she hugged me, and kissed me!

Another beautiful incident was when I went with a big bouquet of flowers to greet her on her 60th birthday. My mother was also with me. She was very relaxed when we reached there. She then surprised me by presenting me a silk sari of hers, one which I had admired some time back. She kept that in mind and gave it to me. I still keep the sari as a treasure. She was a very warm and giving person.

She was very happy when she heard I was writing a book on her. She treated me like her daughter. She kept on telling me, 'There's a lot to be said. Only you can understand all that.' Because of her ill health, I don't think she told me everything.

My interactions with her were not like interviews. Nobody was allowed to tape an interview of hers. That had been the tradition. When Sadasivam Mama was alive, he never allowed that.

Deep down, she knew she had done something great. But she never showed it; she was a humble soul. She loved entertaining people. She herself used to serve coffee and snacks to all her guests.

She also had the knack of making each one who knew her feel very special. She noticed even the smallest things. She would notice if I was wearing very few bangles, she would comment if I tied my hair differently.

She saw something positive about everything. She always used to encourage me in everything. When I went to see her once, she said, 'Now you must get the Sangeeta Kalanidhi award.' I was so shocked! I said, 'Amma, it is such a prestigious award which you yourself got. Your saying this is more than my getting the award. I feel you have given me the award. I don't need anything more than that.'

Her voice had a lilt. She never whispered. It was always in full strength. The way she said va, va, va... [come, come, come] was like a welcome song for me. Combined with that was her warm smile. She welcomed everybody with a big smile and joy. That would make you also feel joyous. She was very particular that she herself gave kumkum [vermillion] and vettila paakku [betel nut and leaf]. Of course, how can anyone forget her chukku [ginger] coffee?

I don't think M S Subbulakshmi can die. She is eternal.

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