Meet The 22-Year-Old Ajay Devgn

'You are scared about the next film: 'Will it work? Will it be as good as my previous film?''
'Deep inside, I think everybody is scared.'

Long before he became one of Bollywood's most bankable stars, a 22-year-old Ajay Devgn was already navigating the pressures of early fame with striking honesty.

Fresh off the success of 1991's Phool Aur Kaante, the young actor opened up about ambition, anxiety, love, and the realities of making it big in the film industry, offering a glimpse into the mindset that would shape his enduring career.

In this throwback interview, Ajay Devgn -- who celebrates his 57th birthday on April 2 -- tells Dinesh Raheja and Jitu Kothari, "I play to win - always. I hate to lose but when I do, I try to be graceful."

'Deep inside, I think everybody is scared'

Success has come to you at a very early age. Comment.

I'm not a child prodigy. I'm 22, yaar. Still, I feel very lucky. I also realise that it would be easy to slip into the star syndrome. But the problem is, success has increased my responsibilities so much.

I first met Mahesh Bhatt soon after my first film, Phool Aur Kaante, released.

I was standing outside my office when his car passed by and Mahesh Bhatt put his head out of the window to yell at me, 'Don't look so happy. This is the beginning of your problems.' He was right. I mean, you want those problems, but they are problems, yaar.

There is a lot of tension. You are scared about the next film: 'Will it work? Will it be as good as my previous film?'

Deep inside, I think everybody is scared.

I'm always tense wondering how I'm going to keep getting better to maintain this success and this leaves me with no time to kick up my heels or freak out. Though don't worry, I haven't forgotten how to do it, totally. I'll make up for lost time soon.

Did you have to struggle to get your first break?

I've struggled hard for five years. Not in the sense of going to producers' offices and asking for work -- I've never done that -- but by way of slogging hard in every class you can think of. I've done action classes, dance classes, acting classes... My dad always said, 'Learn and come to the industry. Don't come and learn.'

I was writing, editing and directing films with a video camera from the time I was 12. If someone had offered me a film as a director before my debut as an actor, I would have opted for direction.

My father wanted me to be a hero. Initially, my father was going to launch me in films, but it didn't work out. Then Deepak Shivdasani was going to start a film with me, but that too didn't start.

Finally, my dad's friend and Raj Kapoor's erstwhile assistant Kuku Kohli came up to me with a good script and I said, 'Why not?' to Phool Aur Kaante.

Your entry astride two motorbikes has created tremendous buzz. How difficult was it to shoot?

My father asked if I would be able to pull it off and I said, yes, though I had not even tried it. But I could do a split so I was confident.

'Right now, I wouldn't commit to anybody because I'm not in love'

Are you one of those men who are afraid of love and commitment?

Sort of. Right now, I wouldn't commit to anybody because I'm not in love. Nor am I prepared to fall in love because my work occupies the predominant place in my heart.

So as long as I'm not in love, I'm apprehensive of the havoc it might create in my life. But once you're in love, you're not afraid of anything.

Have you ever been in a relationship?

Yes. We broke up about a year ago. The major problem was the amount of time I was giving my work. She felt I was consequently not making the effort to spare enough time for her.

What do you think of the state of the world today?

It's scr**ed up, man. From terrorism to pollution to values... we are so much worse off than our forefathers. Compare even the green Juhu of my dad's day to the smokestack it has become today.

How strong is the competitive streak within you?

I play to win, always. I hate to lose but when I do, I try to be graceful. I feel a spirit of competitiveness is very important. It motivates you to hone your rough edges and be better.

'If I get a day off tomorrow, I'd be biting my nails, wondering why I'm not that much in demand anymore'

Who do you think of as your rivals today?

Everybody is everybody else's rival in the industry and at the same time, nobody is. Specifically speaking, see, I guess, Aamir and Salman can be called my rivals but then again, they have been around for a much longer time, so you can't really compare.

Anyway, I don't spend too much time thinking about all this. It's unhealthy.

What is your idea of perfect happiness?

The term by itself is a paradox. One can never be perfectly happy. Whatever you may get you'll always want more.

See, before Phool Aur Kaante, I was only hoping that my film should do well and that I should be shooting day and night. Now that I'm doing just that, I feel I should get sometime to freak out or to sleep also.

But probably, if I get a day off tomorrow, I'd be biting my nails, wondering why I'm not that much in demand anymore.

'Did I not get along with Madhu? Let's say, I managed'

Ajay Devgn, in his own words.

My real name is Vishaal. But I saw that the previous Vishaals in the film industry had not made much progress, so I decided to change my name to Ajay.

I am an Aries. They love themselves, I am told, but I am different, I love others too.

I am reasonably tall, 5'11" to be precise. It gives me enough reason to spread my weight around.

Besides learning how to fight from my dad, Veeru Devgan, I have also imbibed the quality of speaking the truth -- even if it hurts -- from him.

Like with my parents, my relationship with God is cool.

Do I have a killer instinct? I'll find out with time. Right now, I am doing pretty fine with the 3 Ds -- devotion, dedication and discipline.

I do smoke cigarettes. My cologne is Drakkar Noir.

Undergarments are something I am very particular about.

I am very fond of footwear, and most comfortable in shorts.

I have begun combing my hair only after coming to films.

My favourite film is Guide, and my favourite director is Vijay Anand. I hold Manoj Kumar high in my esteem.

Archies are my favourite comics and Popeye my fave cartoon figure.

When I had the time, I solved a lot of crosswords.

My favourite song is Private Investigation (by Dire Straits).

For holidays, Mauritius with somebody vivacious would be wow!

I am not a dreamer, I have visions.

I have got my feet firmly planted on the ground, I intend keeping them there.

When life gets too hectic, I try to distance myself and meditate.

I learned about sex naturally. I can't reveal more.

What I charge per film is what the producers are willing to pay. Why not make hay while the sun shines?

I feel, I can't do enough. I want to be acknowledged as a versatile actor, not just an action hero.

I desire that all my desires are fulfilled.

Phool Aur Kaante is the best gift I have received to date. It surpassed even my expectations.

Did I not get along with Madhu? Let's say, I managed.

My philosophy is simple, 'You cannot get phool without kaante in life.' Accept that, and you'll have no complaints whatsoever.

Photographs curated by Satish Bodas/Rediff