Life Sutras: Be a chronic optimist no matter what!

Citing a column by noted writer-humourist Khushwant Singh, we asked readers to mail us their 'Life Sutras' -- principles to lead life to the fullest. Here is the first set of responses.

'Be a chronic optimist no matter what!'

Research shows optimistic people have better physical health, mental health and life than people without optimism, according to US based reader Ashok Kumar Gupta, a consultant (Mental Health, Learning), certified life coach, certified NLP practitioner, trainer and author. Here is his point of view:

Things may not happen according to your preferences and desires. Your present situation may be worse and you are seeing only blind alleys all around. But, by being hopeful, you shall open a thin path in the midst of thick, dark clouds. Experts say life becomes what you expect it to.

The world-famous plastic surgeon Dr Maxwell Maltz discovered that the brain works on the principle of 'servo mechanism' to achieve what you believe you should achieve. If you expect good things to happen, most likely they will, to match your expectations.

On the other hand, if you think in terms of failure, the same principle applies.

My life was the worst back in the day. There seemed no way out -- bad health, failure, substance abuse, physical and mental abuse and what not. But I don't know why, I always had a vague image of a favourable life in the future, and that the situation would change for the better.

Amazingly, after 40 years, it has more or less landed on the right track, just as I had visualised.

During my childhood, I persistently imagined living in the USA despite a lack of any resources, money and background. For a person like me, then, the goal appeared impossible! Surprisingly, I migrated to the USA in 1992, overcoming rock-solid personal problems!

So never stop brightly picturing what you desire, even if you think that conditions will never be how you wish them to be. In the long term, your brain's above-referred special mechanism will keep working subconsciously, to produce what you are seeing on your mental screen and hope to receive.

Share your mantras for living life to the full with us, and other readers. Tell us how you stay happy and healthy, serene and full of life. Please send us an e-mail at getahead@rediff.co.in (Subject line: 'My Life Sutras'). And we will publish the best ones on Rediff.com.

Illustration: Uttam Ghosh

Here, Dubai-based marketing manager Narinder Khanna shares his advice:

My mantras are:

• Have a cheerful nature. Always think you are having a great day. Always believe you are better off than millions of other people.
• Have a short memory for unpleasant incidents or persons. The sooner you forget bad things, the longer you will remember the good deeds of others.
• Share your fortune/ knowledge/ happiness with the less fortunate. It usually multiplies.
• Be smartly dressed. This usually prompts you to look after your health and appearance.
• It's good to have a routine, but try and do one or two different things every day -- try different foods, instead of reading write something, try gardening instead of walking, try yoga or simply get out of your regular surroundings.
• Meet as many interesting people as you can, especially the people who can make you laugh. Personally, I would rather keep company with a man or woman who can make me laugh than a person who can teach me how to lead a healthy life. There is no better elixir of life than a good, hearty laugh.
• Learn to take one step at a time when you are young and then try and be content after 60 years.
• Contrary to the belief, always think there is a tomorrow. After all, you can only do so much today.
• As you grow old, you may have blood pressure or sugar or cholesterol problems, but don't lose your sleep over them. Take a tablet and let it worry about your ailment. After all, what do you pay the doctor for? It is in his interest to keep you alive longer if he wants to make more money.
• Have a decent bank balance, so that you do not need to worry about food or travel or medical costs.
• Always remember the Almighty, first thing in the morning and before going to bed, for all the goodies He has showered upon you.
• Avoid debts like the plague.

Illustration: Uttam Ghosh

Aditi Joshi's Life Sutras comprise the following five key elements:

1. Be positive

No matter what shade of blue -- be sure you can beat it. All it takes to rise up and come out of a wreck is your positive attitude. Even when the world criticises you, be sure of your will and just reach out for the stars. I lost 20 kgs in the last one year and it was a mix of the right diet, right exercises and a positive frame of mind that helped me shape up.

2. Listen to music

Music therapy is the best; it takes you to a different level of relaxation. Music in any form -- be it your child's laughter, the tinkling of a wind chyme, soulful ragas, a popular number from Bollywood/ Hollywood or your mother's lullaby -- is just the best escape to relax an overworked mind.

3. Eat well

You are what you eat -- I truly believe this. Eating well is important. Managing a well-balanced diet and eating everything you love is the secret to a happy persona. Eat in quantifiable amounts and don't overwork your tastebuds -- just bite into what you like.

4. Have a hobby or take up an activity -- 'me' time is important

Spend some 'me' time alone. You know what you'd like to do with your spare time, so give yourself that chance to do it. Be active -- go for a walk, run, learn cooking, swim, play in the park with your/ your neighbour's kids, read, write, do anything that you want, just as long as you're doing it for yourself and no other reason.

5. Smile away to glory

Laughter is bliss. Learn how to cherish small, happy moments and then smile or laugh and enjoy that experience. Share joys, read jokes and pass them along, make time to cheer yourself up and then grin looking at yourself in the mirror. That long face isn't yours -- but that infectious curve on your lips that says 'cheese' is yours for sure!

Illustration: Dominic Xavier

Nalini Jagnat Kudalkar shares her six-point plan to live life to the fullest:

1. Be happy with whatever you have today.

2. Pray to God daily for your wellbeing, as well as for others.

3. If you cannot forgive, then forget a particular incident permanently.

4. Whatever comes to you for free, accept as God's blessings.

5. Never tease or criticise others, as that brings a curse along with it.

6. Never take advantage of someone's good faith.

Illustration: Uttam Ghosh

And finally, Kalla Shankar Rao has an interesting take on his Life Sutras:

1. I never entertain thoughts like 'I am tired', 'I am busy' or 'I have too much work'.

2. I gained full theoretical knowledge of spirituality and use it in my daily life, even in times of trouble or when accidents happen. I tell myself, 'This world is seemingly existing', 'I am the Being, thinking that I am a human being is just knowledge' and 'Free yourself from the knowledge in which you got caught'.

3. Read TOI and Rediff newspapers daily and stay online all the time, even on mobile.

4. I always feel superior, rather than getting depressed by feeling inferior.

5. I always try to dominate others, even superiors, at work.

6. I say sorry to others whenever I feel I have hurt them, or made them feel bad.

7. My biggest regret was working in India for 14 years. I met with many accidents and got depressed because of the treatment meted out to us diploma holders by college seniors -- the reason for this was that we were not engineering graduates. I came abroad to work seven years ago and am very happy with life, earning Rs 3 to 5 lakh a month.

8. Take total care of your mom, your wife and your kids' health. When (my) Mom got dementia, I did my best to bring her back to normal. She is fine now and that gave me a kick like a five crore lottery.

Share your mantras for living life to the full with us, and other readers. Tell us how you stay happy and healthy, serene and full of life. Please send us an e-mail at getahead@rediff.co.in (Subject line: 'My Life Sutras'). And we will publish the best ones on Rediff.com.

Illustration: Uttam Ghosh