Proposals look effortless on Instagram... Fairy lights... Sunsets... Perfect rings... A partner who somehow arrived 'surprised' yet perfectly dressed...
Behind the scenes though, it's usually a mix of nerves, secrecy, near-disasters and the fervent hope that the moment lands the way it's meant to.
This Valentine's week, three men who planned the 'perfect' proposal tell us what it actually takes to pull off that dream moment.
Rahul and Simoni
For Rahul, the decision to propose wasn't a lightning bolt moment. "It was a slow realisation," he says. "Over time, I just knew."
The real challenge was the secrecy. His girlfriend Simoni had been asking him to propose for a while. So on their flight to Bekal, Kerala, when she casually brought up the topic again, Rahul had to do something to throw her off.
"I picked a fake fight saying she was pressurising me. I had to throw her off so she wouldn't suspect anything."
The trip itself was disguised as something mundane -- Taj hotel points (they were to stay at the Taj Bekal Resort & Spa) that his sister had and wasn't planning to use. Meanwhile, Rahul had planned a beautiful beach proposal with a videographer.
The only thing he was worried about was the crowd. "It was a weekday thankfully. The beach was almost empty. Everything went better than expected."
Talking about the one regret he has, Rahul says, "She didn't love the dress she was wearing. Maybe I should have found a way to get her to wear something else."
His advice to men planning to propose: "Don't do it alone. Get help."
And what mattered most in the end? "The emotions, undoubtedly."
Rikin and Rishika
This is my perfect proposal.
For my boyfriend, Rikin, the decision came a few months before our trip to Dubai. "I had a random epiphany. I just knew it was time."
The biggest challenge for Rikin was not letting me know what was happening.
"Keeping it a secret was tough," confesses Rikin. "You would get doubtful and ask me multiple questions."
The yacht he booked turned out smaller than the pictures, but, by then, it was too late to switch.
"It was December in Dubai. I had to catch the sunset. If I missed it, the whole plan would be ruined," says Rikin.
Rikin says he didn't overthink the emotional part or get nervous. "I knew exactly what I wanted and exactly what you wanted."
His advice? "Don't think, go for it. Proposing is like scuba diving. It is scary at first but once you do it, it is a different world."
I asked him what mattered more -- the emotions or the set-up? "It is very subjective," he says, "and depends on you. But if you are with the right person, it will feel special anyway."
His only regret is paying for the yacht in advance. "Never pay the full location money in advance. If I hadn't paid for the yacht in advance, I could have negotiated for the kind of yacht I wanted."
Valerian and Nikita
Unlike the others, Valerian's journey sounds like a rom-com gone rogue.
He knew he'd propose one day because it meant a lot to Nikita. "She always dreamed of a proposal since she watched One Tree Hill. Over time, it became special to me too."
But the planning was definitely not an easy process for him.
His first choice was Cappadocia, Turkey, but the day he was supposed to book the tickets, an earthquake struck Turkey.
He then shifted to Paris but their visas got rejected.
He tried Dubai next and even made most of the bookings but Nikita changed her mind because she'd been there too many times.
He moved on to Tanzania, only to realise they couldn't get the yellow fever shot due to a recent illness.
Finally, he booked Vietnam without visas in hand.
By that point, Valerian had learned not to chase perfection. "I just went with the flow. Nothing materialised until the last minute anyway."
His advice: "Always have backup plans and be spontaneous. Sometimes the moment finds you."
Across all three stories, the pattern is the same: The emotion lands harder than the set-up.
Regardless of all the obstacles, that moment, that one knee, that one question will still unfold exactly the way it is meant to be.
And maybe that's the secret of a perfect proposal: You can plan the setting but the heart takes over anyway.
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