Your first Valentine's Day as a couple can feel like a test. How much is too much? How little is too little? Are you supposed to plan something perfect?
But according to Tanya (name changed on request), who's celebrating her first V-day with her boyfriend of few months, it doesn't have to be that deep.
"I'm actually not a Valentine's person; he is. But it's a new feeling after a long time...so yeah, it's cute," she says.
Whether you're the romantic one or the "why is this even a holiday?", one, the trick is to find a middle ground that feels natural.
Merge the day with something else
For Tanya, Valentine's Day happens to fall on their monthversary and, instead of planning two different things, they have decided to make it one bigger moment.
They're heading out on their first trip together.
"I was anyway planning a trip off work. He joined in... and now it's our first trip together!"
If your schedule is packed, or you're not sure how to plan the day, combine it with another meaningful moment like an anniversary, a day off, or simply a weekend you're already spending together.
Don't create unnecessary dilemmas
Most couples assume that the first Valentine's Day comes with pressure like finding the right gift, spending the right amount, planning the perfect date.
Tanya doesn't think so.
"To be honest, I don't think there's been so much of a dilemma."
Sometimes the pressure is imagined. If it feels easy, let it be easy.
Have the 'too much or too little' talk
This is the biggest anxiety for new couples: Are my efforts matching theirs?
For Tanya, it's a sweet role-reversal.
"Surprisingly, I was always 'too much' in my previous relationship. This time he is, in a good way. I feel like I'm doing too little but we talk it out and balance."
And that's the secret: Communicate instead of guessing.
Special can be simple
The perfect first Valentine's Day isn't about grand gestures, it's about presence.
For Tanya, it is all about "being together, having a good meal, a long conversation, watching the sunset over the sea."
And because they're heading to an island, the fairy-tale vibe is just a bonus.
The bottom line is, you don't need to take on the pressure if it is your first Valentine's Day. It just needs two people who adore each other enough to show up, talk, and share something that feels like them.
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