Funny examples of Pinglish or Pakistani English are growing by the day and Pakistanis may soon finish a close second to the Japanese, whose "creative" use of English language has had no equal so far.
A Pakistani student, who is unwell, wrote to his headmaster, "I am suffering from fever, please declare holiday to the school; an employee wrote to his boss, "Since I have to go to my village to sell my land along with my wife, please sanction me one week's leave"; and a candidate's application read, "This has reference to your advertisement calling for a 'typist and an accountant Male or Female'... As I am both for past several years and I can handle both, I am applying for the post."
These are just some examples of Pinglish that software designer Adil Najam has painstakingly compiled. Najam also took time to define Pinglish, which according to him, emerges when English words are mixed with words of a Pakistani language -- usually, but not solely, Urdu. Pinglish is not just getting the construction of the sentences wrong, but also about pronunciation.
"Many Pakistanis often have trouble when two consonants appear together without a vowel in between. The word 'school' is often mispronounced as either 'sakool' or 'iskool', depending on whether your native tongue is Punjabi or Urdu," pointed out blogger Riaz Haq.
Commonplace words such as "automatic" is "aatucmatuc" in Pinglish, while "genuine" is "geniean" and "current" is "krunt". Some words also take a plural form such as "roadien" for roads, "exceptionein" for exception and "classein" for classes. TV channels and some newspapers also add to the Pinglish dictionary every day.
"Heavy traffic using under passes at Lahore Canal is a serious threat to the life and safety of small vehicles," went a report in a leading English daily.
"He advised them to perform their duties as sacred purpose and pay full respect to road users," stated another report from the same newspaper.
The bus conductor calls out "Trouser Camp" when the bus hits Transit Camp in Rawalpindi and the road sign in Urdu states "Sixsath Road" instead of "Sixth Road".
Examples of Pinglish have also been recorded outside Pakistan like the grocery shop in Chicago that is named "JK Graw-series".
As long as Pakistanis argue that there is no need to speak correct English and continue to translate their thoughts in Urdu into English without bothering about syntax, Pinglish will continue to add gems such as this letter to a boss: "As my mother-in-law has expired and I am responsible for it, please grant me 10 days leave."