Expectations of not getting attention, time, love, care, and intimacy from their partner can make the marriage fail, alerts Sybil Shiddell, Country Manager India, Gleeden, a discreet extra marital dating Web site.
As far as history goes, it's normal for humans to have more than one partners. But as per societal norms, men and women are expected to spend their lives with a single partner.
Is it too difficult for our complex brains to contemplate living with one partner forever?
Then why do you think people cheat?
As per one of our surveys conducted among 10,000 of our users based out of the tier-1 cities in India like Mumbai, Delhi NCR, Chennai, Kolkata, Hyderabad Bengaluru, and Pune, aged between 35-45 years, infidelity is not so uncommon any more.
While infidelity maybe considered a taboo worldwide, there are many aspects to it.
Cheating or the will to cheat is not the only reason why people get involved into extramarital affairs.
Incidents like negligence, domestic violence, loneliness etc are few of the many reasons that build up to the cause.
Based on the survey and feedback from our users, these are some of the top reasons why men and women cheat in a relationship:
1. Boredom
It is obvious to get bored of a relationship at some point.
People look for changes after a certain time, experimenting with their likes.
In such situations, it is easy to get attracted to those who shake their daily routine by kicking them.
Loneliness makes people look for a new partner for better understanding and coziness.
2. Communication gap
Communication is vital for success in any relationship, especially in marriage.
No relationship is perfect. But it can be improved through better communication.
Sharing thoughts, listening to your partner, and making small changes can ignite the spark now and then.
But with our busy lives, couples find it a challenge to resolve these issues leading to communication gaps, forcing them to look for support outside the marriage.
3. Dry Spell
Some people get lazy, tired, and exhausted after a point. Most often partners are not on the same page.
When people don't get their expectations fulfilled at home, they turn to the outside world for love and companionship.
Not having a respectful conversation, or discussing how you both feel about sex, and how your life, work or relationship has hijacked your spark are signs your marriage is going through a dry spell.
Not meeting the demands of your partner also turns them down.
4. High-end expectations
It is human nature to expect and get hurt when things don't turn out their way.
Thus, expectations of not getting attention, time, love, care, and intimacy from their partner can make the marriage fail.
Although at times, people stop doing things for their partner due to their comfort zone which tends the other one to think they are not worthy of love.
5. Past relationships
Many people, including married couples, have not yet discovered and understood, how to move on from a past relationship.
This makes them judge their current relationship and partner with their previous one, making them hurt themselves and not giving them a chance to understand and accept their current partner.
People getting forcefully married also go back to their previous partners to whom they were once attracted to.
6. Newbie trends
In this fast paced world, dating trends keep hopping up now and then.
The hook-up culture is one such trend that instantly draws people to follow it.
Some do it because they are not happy in their marriage while some follow it just to be on top of the trend.
7. Mono/Polygamy
Couples having the same mindset over having more than one partner don’t call it cheating in the marriage.
They accept that a person can fall in love with 2-3 people, calling it an open relationship.
They have a level of understanding of each other and view their partner’s choice of having a relationship outside their marriage as natural.
Nowadays, it's not uncommon to see a throuple living together in the same house accepting each other as family.
8. Domestic violence
Why would someone be in a relationship where there's no respect?
Respect is the base of any relationship.
Whether physical or sexual, 8 out of 10 women experience domestic violence, crushing their self-esteem and hampering their mental and physical health.
Who wants to be in a dead-end marriage?
When they can't take help from their own family and society's judgments won’t let them take a divorce, finding someone outside their marriage is a boon.
They get a chance of looking at the world again with dreamy eyes.
9. Go with the flow
A cozy environment with high-on drinks can make people slip into someone else's parts without even having thought over the consequences.
Yes, it is easy to fall into this trap of minute sexual arousal leading the whole marriage foundation to derail.
Most people experience it during their office trips, late-night stays, partieswith old mates, etc.
10. Sexaholic
High on drinks? Nope, just horny.
It might sound odd, but people can get addicted to sex.
After all, hormones are just chemical juices moving around.
It is a compulsive behaviour -- watching porn, masturbating uncontrollably, and having multiple sexual partners.
They can't stop thinking about sex daily even when they get ashamed about their urges.
When they are high on substance, some individuals are in a position where they perform sexual activities persistently, unable to control them.
If you are experiencing any of the above signs in your relationship, you are clearly disappointed with your partner and may be looking for a change.
Infidelity may not the solution, but it's a warning sign that all's not well with your lover, partner or spouse.
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