The key is to find ways to manage the stress of being in a sexless marriage, so that you can focus on building your relationship back up and moving forward, advises Sybil Shiddell, country manager-India for Gleeden, a discreet extra marital dating Web site.
A sexless marriage can be an especially difficult challenge to navigate.
When a couple is no longer sexually active, it can create a disconnect between them and lead to feelings of isolation, loneliness, and even depression.
It's a situation that many couples struggle with on some level, but there are tools and resources that can help you get through it.
1. Managing Stress Levels of Sexual Frustration
Sexual frustration in a marriage can make things pretty difficult, but it doesn't have to be a total disaster.
The key is to find ways to manage the stress of being in a sexless marriage, so that you can focus on building your relationship back up and moving forward.
There are several effective ways to cope with the stress of a sexless marriage, from utilising distraction techniques such as taking up a new hobby or activity, to serious communication with your spouse about what needs to change.
2. Set aside time each day for yourself
Whether it's going for a walk, listening to your favorite music or reading a book, take the time to do something that brings peace and relaxation into your life.
3. Communicate openly
One of the best ways to manage stress is to communicate openly with your spouse about the feelings you're having and what has caused them.
This will help you both understand each other better and work towards getting back together.
4. Learning to Communicate Effectively
Learning to communicate effectively is a key skill when dealing with a sexless marriage.
This means speaking your truth, being open and listening to the other person without judgment.
Being able to explain your needs without coming across as critical or angry can help you have more productive conversations.
5. Redefining Intimacy and Romance
Finding love again after a sexless marriage doesn't have to mean finding a new partner.
It can also mean rediscovering intimacy and romance with your current one.
Redefining intimacy and romance is all about shifting your focus on the little things to make each other feel special and loved.
6. Connect With Your Partner
Spending time connecting with your partner every day is also important.
It could be through conversation, shared activities, or simply being physically close without expecting anything else.
Being present and engaged in the moment can help you to stay connected to one another.
7. Date Nights and Vacations
Having fun together is essential for getting your spark back, so plan a date night once a month or even once a fortnight to do something new and exciting together.
It doesn't have to be expensive; you could have a picnic in the park or explore somewhere you've never been before! On top of that, book time away in regular intervals - think weekend getaways or longer vacations if possible to take some pressure off and make it easier to reconnect with one another.
8. Exploring Solutions to Reinvigorate a Sex Life
It's natural for couples to feel awkward about discussing sex when things have cooled off in the bedroom.
But it's important to make an effort to explore solutions that can help you both feel comfortable and re-establish a vibrant sex life.
9. Intimacy Outside of Sex
The physical distance and lack of intimacy in a sexless marriage can leave you feeling alone and disconnected from your partner.
So it's important to find ways other than sex that help the two of you stay connected.
For example, holding hands or hugging more often, taking romantic walks together or simply sharing stories about your day or week can be simple but meaningful gestures that help bridge gaps in communication between couples.
10. Sex therapy
Sex therapy is a great way to gain some perspective on how to heal sexual issues and gives couples the opportunity to openly talk about their concerns and fears without judgment or stress.
Working with a therapist provides much needed guidance and support during this difficult time, helping each partner recognize what's needed to stay emotionally connected and work toward rebuilding trust and intimacy in their relationship.
11. Have an affair
If nothing else helps and you really can't live without passion in your life, there is always the option of finding it elsewhere.
There is a lot of stigma and judgment associated with affairs.
It's simple to overlook the fact that affairs don't always take place for nefarious motives or include a single villain controlling everyone in their vicinity.
People may have affairs because they are just not getting what they want from their marriage or present relationship.
It might assist in satisfying any unfulfilled physical or mental demands you might feel your significant other is no longer able to meet for you.
Also, you can examine other facets of yourself that were previously hidden because of social expectations or your marital connection.
Moreover, extramarital relationships do not need to involve love or strong emotional ties; rather, they might simply be used as a means of escaping from the responsibilities and restrictions of conventional relationships.
Feature Presentation: Ashish Narsale/Rediff.com
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